It's more and more rare ok !

But last night was horrible.

Well, to be perfectly clear. Last _evening_ was horrible. It got seriously better in the night, somewhere around midnight and one actually. A kind soul talked me out of the darkness caused by eating not enough medication. ( My educated guess. ) The problem with me being in that kind of mood, is that it's kinda like being drunk.

Meaning I'll say things I normally might think twice about before saying. And later when I feel better, I'll start to wonder why I made everything look so bad. Cuz it can't be that bad can it, feels like it's just in my mind ( well duh ) and I'm just over exaggerating things. So I try to keep quiet, until I get a question. And then it's all comes out.

But what I didn't say last night, even tho I kinda wanted to. Is that when I feel that bad, I start to wonder if it's possible to overdose on my antidepressants. No I haven't tried, no I don't want to try. No I haven't looked it up on the net, I don't want to and I don't think my medication is that heavy anyways. It's just a thought.

However, I don't like it. So whenever I get it, I think about all the ppl that I know that likes me. And then I lock the bad thought up in a box with very large and heavy locks.