Insane in the birdhouse.

Not sure what to say, I still feel like crap.

Tomorrow I'm calling the doc to see if I'm getting a refill on my medication or not. It's most likely a yes, just a matter of how many words / appointments / days I'll have to wait ( without eating any meds ) before I get it. To be honest, it's not that I really really want it even. I just see the logic in eating it while my mood is shit and I'm waiting for my life to change for the better.

It's still an improvement tho that while being down, I still haven't reverted to the sick feeling of wanting to be dead. I'm happy ( well sorta ) to know that the feeling of being down doesn't necessarily have to be tied to the feeling of a death wish. Funny, it almost cheers me up even. So it's really not all darkness and gloom here. I get some moments of joy every day anyway.

And also, it's almost impossible to be sad / angry all the time when you live in this house with my moms totally insane cats. They are hilarious at times and seriously awesome the rest of it. And my baby bird. Who despite only having seen me about 2 or 3 days a year these last few years, still remembers me and sings with me when I call to him and pick him up. I love him.